By age 20, Isabel Klee had dropped out of college and traveled the world, but felt isolated and unmoored—so she moved to New York City to find a community she could call her own. She enrolled at a new college and found roommates; and, in the midst of dating, studying, and job searching, she started volunteering at an animal shelter.
The journey from that moment to this one—with her own winsome rescue dog, Simon; an upcoming wedding; and some two million followers for @SimonSits, the social-media accounts she uses to help dogs find their people—is the subject of her new memoir, Dogs, Boys, and Other Things I’ve Cried About, out April 28 from HarperCollins. Klee took some time to chat with Digest about her wedding, the magic of fostering, and The Discourse around dogs in shared spaces.
Dogs, Boys, and Other Things I’ve Cried About is available for preorder, and hits shelves on April 28.
Digest: You’re getting married—congratulations! What role will Simon have in your wedding?
Isabel Klee: I don’t know if he’ll have an actual role in the wedding, but he’ll be at every single event. My fiancé and I decided to get married at a sleepaway camp. We wanted it to be dog-friendly—it’s going to be a celebration of dogs the entire weekend. There’s nothing that makes Simon happier than running free in the woods. He actually came with us to the venue and had the time of his life. So that was what sold us, just how happy he was.
On that note, there’s been quite a bit of discourse on how integrated dogs should be in public life and shared spaces. What guidelines do you think responsible dog owners and non-dog owners can follow to help ease this tension, and keep people and dogs safe and happy?
I love a dog at a bar, but I think a lot of dogs are uncomfortable in public situations. I rarely bring Simon to bars or restaurants because I know he would not be happy. That said, there are dogs who love going to bars, and are super social and comfortable. I think it’s really specific to your dog.
You moved seven times in your 20s; what did it mean to have him as a constant amid all that change?
Simon is surprisingly adaptable to new situations, and I feel like he almost understood in those situations that he needed to be my constant. With every new apartment or roommate or cat that we were living with, we would turn towards each other. That was really helpful in those years of so much change, to have each other. It almost felt like anywhere was my home as long as we were together, and vice versa—as long as I was there and his bed was there, he was good.
How are dating and fostering alike?
So much of falling in love and of fostering is about trust: building a deep, meaningful relationship; finding common ground; and getting into a routine together. It doesn’t happen overnight. A lot of people expect that when you get a dog they just automatically love you and you just automatically love them. It takes a lot of work. You can’t just expect somebody with trauma to be open and vulnerable with you from day one—nor would you necessarily want that. Taking your time building that relationship and trust, I think, are clear commonalities.
How are they different?
In the book I say you can use love to heal a broken dog, but you can’t use love to heal a broken man. You can’t love somebody into changing. But you can love a dog back to health and happiness—that’s the magic of fostering.
What did falling in love with dogs teach you about falling in love with people?
Simon taught me that even—especially—when things are hard, it makes that love so much deeper and more meaningful. I adopted him and he had his first seizure four weeks later. It was kind of like, What did I get myself into? I was broke and had enormous vet bills and it was so overwhelming. Luckily I figured it out, and every day we figured it out together. And now here we are seven years later, and it is the most fulfilling and rewarding thing I’ve ever done in my entire life.
I also write about my relationship with my now-fiancé. We went through a lot of trials and tribulations—we broke up; we both did deep therapy. You hear about relationships that are picture-perfect from the beginning, and that was not our relationship. But it is the deepest, most fulfilling love that I’ve ever felt. Just because something is hard doesn’t mean it’s not worth it—it makes it even more worth it and more fulfilling in the end.
Regarding Simon’s idiopathic epilepsy that he’s had since he was 5 months old, you mention in your memoir that you gravitate toward dogs who are challenging in temperament or health needs. What advice do you have for people who want to foster but are scared of having to care for challenging dogs?
You don’t have to care for challenging dogs. Maybe your first foster could be a small, five-to-eight-year-old dog, something manageable and easy. 95% of dogs in animal rescue are completely normal, healthy, well adjusted, friendly to people and dogs. I like to foster the “undesirables” because I adopted and fell in love with a dog who, if I had known that he’d had epilepsy, I probably wouldn’t have adopted him—and I would have missed out on the greatest love of my life. Just because a dog might have challenges doesn’t mean that they won’t make a wonderful pet. But if somebody thinks that feels overwhelming, which I completely understand, it is totally fine to just foster in general. Finding a good rescue that is also really flexible and will respect what you’re looking for and what you feel you can handle is important. When you have a good fostering experience, you want to do it again.
How has your experience with fosters changed the way you see the animal welfare system in general?
I started fostering because I was in my twenties and broke and couldn’t afford a dog of my own, and I just wanted a dog to hang out with. Now I see how needed it is, and how much fostering alleviates the burden on shelters, especially municipal shelters like the Animal Care Centers of New York City.
Ten years ago, when I started working with animals, people would comment on municipal shelters, “Oh my God, that’s a kill shelter.” And at the time I don’t think I quite understood what it meant. Municipal shelters have to take in every single animal who comes to their doorstep. It makes me so angry when these municipal shelters get criticized because in reality, they are the ones who need the most help. They are overflowing because they can’t say no to any animals. At the end of the day, if there’s only 100 kennels and there’s 200 dogs and no one is stepping up to foster, where do those dogs go? It will only get better if we all work together.
What role does Simon play as a foster brother?
I could not do this without Simon. He’s so easygoing and confident. I’ve never seen him upset or frazzled or protective or jealous. Any dog that comes into our house, he welcomes with open arms. I think the most magical part about him is his emotional intelligence and the way he can read a situation. He’s able to meet a dog and immediately understand what they need, whether that’s space or to play or to cuddle. Whatever they need, he picks up on it. He shares his bed, his parents, his toys, everything.
As a preschooler, you pretended to be a dog for five months. That’s what persuaded your parents to bring home your first dog. What does it mean to you now to behave like a dog?
I think the beauty of being like a dog is living in the moment. Being able to get fresh air and enjoy the elements no matter what they are. I love a good nap. Enjoying good food, being with the people that I love. It really is so simple, and dogs have it down.
Would you rather have a dog’s sense of smell or sense of hearing?
Sense of hearing—because I feel like smell, especially in New York City, could get a little gross. Hearing, too, I think would be hard… but then I could eavesdrop on people, which I think would be fun.
The post Isabel Klee of @SimonSits on Fostering, Dating, and Dogs in Bars appeared first on The Farmer’s Dog - Digest.
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